Touch Mugs and Keep it Clean
National Anthem
No, Sarah Palin wasn’t invited. In fact, this tea party had nothing to do with politics. This tea party actually involved tea, believe it or not.
In one corner, a 50-some year old British man who spent his life in the land of afternoon teas. For years, he perfected the craft of tea consumption.
In the other corner, a 30-some year old American who has only in the past 10 years developed a passion for tea-drinking. A late-comer and clear underdog in this contest.
After an impromptu singing of our respective anthems, the tea drinking began. And let me tell you, there’s nothing like racing to see who can drink a scalding hot beverage the fastest.
We were neck and neck most of the evening, but I surged ahead to take the lead and clinch the victory for Americans everywhere, 8 cups to 7.
With a scalded tongue and a full bladder, I raised my arms in victory to chants of, “USA! USA!”
Later that night, I realized the consequences a drinking over a gallon (4+ liters) of hot tea. Kidneys working overtime to send me to the bathroom every 15 minutes until 3 am.
Mr. Tea Oversees the Carnage
The Conciliatory Handshake